loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
