Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Dick very happy bro
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
