There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
