if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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