do herpes really smell.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
