I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize