Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
