dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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