come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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