He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
His nipple licking is glorious
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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