I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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