I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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