He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
