So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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