Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
