What did we do last night that was yellow?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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