just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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