It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I want her autograph on my taint
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
