I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
