Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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