READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
