I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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