We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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