We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
my phone needs a breathalizer
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
