P.S. I can't hear my feet
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I came so hard my ears popped.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
