I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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