i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize