What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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