"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize