yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
