i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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