Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize