Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
