I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
