HIV tests are more positive than that guy
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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