butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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