Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
