girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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