Where did you get a picture of my penis
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
