Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You're a waste of cheezeits
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
