In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
