You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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