Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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