There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
