girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
