I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
