Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
