The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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