I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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