Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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